Tuesday, September 8, 2009

It got me thinking

Red moon is up in the sky, because i'm gonna blog about wat i'm feeling right now.

Debate at MMU was good, at least my objective was achieved. Guess my junior've got their fair share of experience, even for Ho Inn and Allan as they're both new to BP. I have not much of expectation but for them to just enter tourneys and do their best.

Anyway, the debate experience wasn't wat i wanna blog about.

I was talking to Alex from MMUM. We go waaaaay back in debate tourneys. Knew him since 1st year i think.

What we chatted about really got me thinking about my commitment in debate club :/

Me: U still active in debate man?
Him: Yeah, but slowly retiring now. I'm passing on the club to the juniors now.
Me: Yeah, final year ady eh?
Him: yeap. But also I wanna step out of the debating circle. Gotta join some other social clubs too. I don't wanna limit my social circle to those just from debates.
Me: Hmmm made sense. :)

I have, all my years in UTM, gave 150% commitment into debate club.
I gotta admit, at certain points (in fact there're alot of points) i felt as though i'm the only one commiting myself.

Others have other commitment besides debate. Mel's with IEM+Swim+a whole lot of others.
MK's with his research team with lecturer + Jap.
Zhang, Allan with their AIESEC stuffs.
Steven with his bridge thingy.
Ho Inn always wander around.
Khye Lih wit PELTAC

So all tht's left are Kin Hoe, Wen Zhe and I.
I certainly hope Wen Zhe will stay in debate club. I felt sorta bad poking so much of fun at him the other day. He was rather mad at me.

I wanna leave debate club. I think i really do.
But there're few things that's stopping me:
1. i love debate. Period. Not only i learn how to express myself in the best way, i can vent out my anger too in a legal way.

2. I felt compelled to ensure the growth of the club. I've said it a bajillion times, but really Debate Club is the only reason tht kept my mind sane (and sharpen it) while being at UTM.

3. I felt there's a responsibility of mine to pass on my knowledge that i've gotten from Chong, Kin Lik and Keith. (fuck i miss u guys... i really do...)

I don't even know where can i go. Should i go and have a try at AIESEC?
IEM's a joke now ever since tht stu-politician-dent took over.
Golden Key, i don't even know wat's happening.

Maybe i'll leave next semester. I wanna join tournaments end of this year.

I hope i have the strength and determination to do it.

p.s: i hope none of the guys from debate club reads this